The Sneezle Solution

Hi! Remember Ella from the other day? If not you can go back and read her story here: https://shannonmccauley.com/2022/11/05/the-complete-cauldron . Anyway, today has not gone her way. She isn’t feeling very well which means she has to take medicine. But who wants to do that? Certainly not this tiny witch. See what happens.

Hi. Remember me? … Sniff Sniff… I am Ella, the wand witch. We’ve met before in another story. I live in a regular house in a regular town. …Sniffle…  I go to a regular school every day, except for the second Tuesday in the week. On that day, I go to The Complete Cauldron, a witch’s school.

Achoo! It never fails… sniffle. Every year at wintertime I come home from my ordinary school with a cold. I try to hide it from my mom but that just doesn’t work. Moms know everything. You would never catch a cold from a witch’s school. That’s because at the very first sign of a cold, our moms and dads rush off to the Witch Doctor to get the Sneezle Solution. It is the cure for a common cold. Why don’t you know about it? That’s because most ordinary humans would not drink anything that had dragon tongue and sea monster scales in it. Especially because most regular humans choose not to believe those things are real. Silly people. Dragons are really beautiful animals and most are very kind. Oh sure, they occasionally eat a barbecued princess or two but even dragons get hungry.

Achoo! Oops so where was I? Oh yeah I forgot, the Sneezle Solution. It is this brown, sticky goop that the witch doctor gives us at the very first sign of a cold and it is disgusting! It tastes like… well it is hard to say what it tastes like. I think it tastes like sweaty gym socks would taste. GROSS! Our moms and dads don’t have to take it. They had to drink it so much as kids that they never catch a cold when they are grown up. I can’t wait to be grown up. Cough … Cough.

Mom says it is really important for me to take the cold medicine. She says that things could happen if Manda gets a cold. I don’t know what kind of things; she won’t tell me. Every time I ask, mom says it is better that we don’t know but things will happen. Manda is a hare-nosed witch like my mom. Only Manda is just a baby so she doesn’t know that yet.

Achoo! Ugh… I hate that stupid potion and now mom is going to make me drink if for sure. If only it tasted like something better… if only it tasted like candy. Maybe it could taste like chocolate covered spiders; they’re my favorites. Hey wait a minute! Are you thinking what I am thinking? I could turn the Sneezle Solution into chocolate. Yummy! Mom would never know. It looks the same. I’ll have to try it when I get a free minute.

Cough… Oh good! Mom is upstairs putting Manda down for her nap. I am going to sneak into the kitchen and change that potion right now. …Sniffle…  I only have a few minutes. Let’s see what kind of spell could I use?

Sneezle Solution I command thee

To taste as sweet as chocolate candy

Turn this smelly sticky brown goop

Into a thick chocolate soup.

That should do it! I could hardly wait to tell mom I had a cold. I heard the telltale creak of the door of my sister’s and my bedroom shutting and I put the bottle on the shelf and ran to lie down on the couch. “Moooooooommmmyyyy, “ I whined. “I think I have a cold.”  Mom ran to the kitchen as quick as she could and got the bottle of Sneezle Solution. Mom was saying something about not wanting a fight from me this time. I complained about taking the medicine, wouldn’t want to seem too happy about it or she would know something was up for sure. Mom reminded me that it only took two spoonfuls three times that day and my cold would be all gone. I opened my mouth and swallowed it down. It tasted great! I made a face anyway and opened for the second spoonful. Mom was so happy that I took it so well.

The only problem with my plan was that I was starting to feel worse not better. When I changed the medicine into chocolate, it wasn’t going to make my cold go away. I was really tired and decided to take a nap. I lay down on my bed and took a nap with Manda. My mom woke me up a few hours later to take my medicine. Only this time, the bottle was empty before the second spoonful was out. My mom said she had to run down to Doc Magoo’s and get more Sneezle Solution. I made a face and cried and whined and even stamped my foot but she said she had to go anyway. Mom asked me to watch Manda while she ran to the doctor’s. If I needed anything, dad was out working in the green house. He is a potion farmer and he grows and sells all the ingredients for all the potions witches and warlocks use. He is always out in the greenhouse making new potions.

I was really tired but watching Manda is usually really easy. She is just a baby after all. She doesn’t do much but lie there and stare at her fingers or toes. I laid on the couch and turned on the TV. It wasn’t too long before Manda let out a tiny little sneeze and then a sniffle. Poor Manda was catching a cold too. Now she would have to take that yucky bottle of Doc Magoo’s medicine too. But if I had taken my medicine like I was supposed to, Manda would not have even have a cold. I felt bad but I was really too tired to think about it. I heard another little sniffle come from the playpen.

Achoo! I was so tired and I was staring at the TV so hard that I didn’t even notice mom’s plant. Mom had a houseplant sitting on the floor near the window. Its stem was starting to grow. It was snaking around the legs of the couch and under the playpen and up the walls. I didn’t even see it until it got to the TV. OH NO! This must be what happens when Manda has a cold. When she sneezes and sniffles she twitches her nose. And when Manda twitches her nose, spells happen. Only because she is a baby, Manda doesn’t know what she is doing. I had to think quickly. If mom came home and saw this mess I was cooked for sure. She would know that the medicine wasn’t really medicine because Manda had a cold too.

I got out my wand and started making the vines disappear. But while I was wrestling with the plant, Manda sniffled again. All of the sudden, the mixer in the kitchen was mixing, the toaster was spitting out toast everywhere and the cuckoo bird on the clock kept popping out and telling the time. I had to work faster!

I finally cut down the vine and made it disappear and had everything quiet in the kitchen. I was in the middle of cleaning up the toast when Manda sneezed again. The dishes starting flying out of the cabinets and I had to run around and try and catch them. The vacuum cleaner started vacuuming all by itself and shades on the windows were rolling up and down as fast as they could go. I caught the dishes and put them all away. I turned the vacuum cleaner off and stopped the shades with my wand. I went back to cleaning up the toast. I heard mom’s car pull into the driveway… uh oh. Time is running out! I started to stuff all the toast behind the curtains in the dining room.

When Manda sneezed again I had to move really fast. I begged her to stop, Mom would be in the house any second. This time when she sneezed, her mobile started spinning, her toys all started playing their songs and lighting up and her stuffed goose turned into a real goose. Manda started giggling.  As fast as I could I waved my wand, the mobile stopped and off went the toys! Phew I did it!

I sat back down on the couch just in time for mom to come in. I would have gotten away with it too only I forgot about the goose. He came running into the living room with tons of toast hanging from his beak. Mom was so scared she almost dropped the new bottle of Sneezle Solution. That would have been horrible. Mom just stared at me. It is not a good sign when Mom’s smile turns upside down and steam starts pouring out of her nose. She knew what I did. I told you before, Moms always know.

Manda and I had to take that yucky medicine and mom made me take the first doses over again, since I had only had chocolate soup. And she said since I was so good at it, I could keep cleaning the kitchen for an entire week.

Sometimes things just aren’t fair. Next time I think I will just take the Sneezle Solution. YUCK!